Friday, May 1, 2015

Home School Decision

I haven't talked about this here. Some people may not even know. Our family has been going through a lot. A lot of changes. But God is good all the time.

Today is the end of Week Four of homeschooling Daniel. There are times when I think that this is HARD. Then there are times that I think, why didn't I do this before?

First, all things are possible with Christ who gives me strength.

Second, it's all God's timing.

This has been a topic of prayer in my life since 2008. However, most of the prayers were about AmandaGrace. Once she was in high school, the prayers changed. She was excelling in her music classes and we knew that she was where she was suppose to be.

There are some activities that students can still take part in if they are home schooled. Sports, Drama and the Musical are a few. But Select Choir is not one of them. It has been Amanda's favorite class since 9th grade. I am not questioning any decision that I made or didn't make regarding Amanda and home school.

Daniel was struggling a lot last year. By February, he was seeing an outside counselor to be evaluated for AD/HD. It was confirmed that he did indeed have AD/HD. However, when I requested that the school evaluate him for a learning disability, it was rejected stating he was on grade point. In other words, he wasn't failing.

I prayed about home school last February for September 2014. I felt that I was receiving a confirmation from God, however my husband had to be on board also.

He was not.

So Daniel began 7th grade and things seemed to be going alright. Until February. Again, February!

Daniel started sinking in to a deep depression. Waking up was a battle. Getting in the vehicle was a battle. Forget breakfast. Then after school, homework was a battle.

We would work together for hours only to have him leave the work in his folder the next day. ZERO.

I was always frustrated and angry. So much of our time was filled with busy work only to have it not counted.

I was in constant communication with his guidance counselor (who is awesome) and five of his teachers. Sometimes they would respond to my emails. Other times they would not.

Once again, I asked Curtis if I could home school Daniel for 8th grade and by the grace of God, he said yes. It was March 7th and my birthday! What an awesome birthday present it was. Now we just needed to get through one more marking period. (I was wiping the third marking period off the books. Cutting bait. Not looking back!)

But the breaking point was shortly after that. The week of March 16th to be exact. Daniel had missed two days the previous week and was absent on the 16th. He had late work due and I was desperately hoping to get the F's up to D's at least. I was working way harder than he was at home. That is a fact. However, when I send 48 (yes FORTY EIGHT) emails in a three week period, there is a problem. Everyone's problem.  And it's a big one.

Finally, on March 20th, at 9 pm, I was crying, Daniel was crying. Curtis was shouting. We raised our white flag and surrendered. And that's all she wrote.

I submitted my paper work to the District office the previous week and we officially started on Monday, April 6th.

I was not ready. I was not prepared. I had lots of doubts. Others had lots of doubts too I am sure. It was completely overwhelming and terrifying for me. BUT GOD...

It's always but God isn't it?

When you see someone drowning don't you throw them a life preserver? Or maybe you just jump in feet first. That's what I did. This is my kid. And this is my job. I am the mom. But don't get me wrong. He only has one Savior. And I am blessed to know that he knows Him. But sometimes we need to step in and do what's best for our family.

Disclaimer: I advise you to make sure that it aligns with what God wants you to do. Like I said, I prayed about this for over a year for Daniel. I prayed about home school in general for SEVEN years. This was not just one of those "jump in feet first" decisions by any means. 

Not once in the last four weeks have I doubted this decision. NOT ONCE. Daniel and I spoke yesterday about home school and he said "we will make this work". He isn't missing middle school at all. Not one thing. Not one person.

Kind of sad.

I have some bitterness about how it all went down in the end. But I know that God is sovereign. I pray Proverbs 3:5-6 EVERY DAY. And every day I have to ask God to work on my heart to remove the bitterness. Please pray for me in that area. I would appreciate it. Thank you!

So you might be asking what we do all day and how it works and many other questions. I will address the content of our day in my next post.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

1 comment:

  1. Good for you! Cyber school was a lot of conversations around here before we pulled the trigger. Definitely the right choice for us right now. That's one thing to consider with it--it's not a forever decision (or it doesn't have to be!)...we make our decisions year by year. Good luck and best wishes!