Saturday, October 6, 2012

Experiencing God

“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord
    and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.
 They are like trees planted along a riverbank,
    with roots that reach deep into the water.
Such trees are not bothered by the heat
    or worried by long months of drought.
Their leaves stay green,
    and they never stop producing fruit.
Jeremiah 17:7-8

These are the verses that I claimed for the months of July and August. This year there has been many verses that have been a constant reminder of God's faithfulness in my life as well as my comfort.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
1 Peter 5:7

And of course...

Delight yourself also in the Lord,

And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

I haven't talked a whole lot about my employment situation. Some, yes. But not too many details. Sometimes the details need to just be between you and the Lord. And this is one of those times. I left my assistant teacher position in April. I took a lesser paying position for six weeks. Then I placed my future in God's hands. (Like it wasn't there already). I prayed all summer and asked God where he wanted me in the fall. I said "what is your will for my life?"

I recently began a study called Experiencing God that is rocking my world. I have been personally experiencing God for eleven years but approaching the Lord in such self-centered ways. I now understand that it is not God's will for my life that I am to be asking about. I need to just ask God what His will is.  

Anyway, I could talk for hours on this new study but I won't. I'll get back to my summer prayer time story.

The summer is always tough because there is very little structure. The only thing I consistently did all summer was take a morning walk and sit on my back porch and pray. But I don't think that I felt the Lord's peace like I should have.

With only about twelve days left of summer, I felt the Lord's direction for my life move me down a path that I would have never in a million years taken my self. I accepted a full time Nanny position for an eight week old boy. (Yes, those are his little feet above.)

I spend about 35 hours a week with little "R" in his home. I have to admit, I feel like a young grandmother. I do things that I would have NEVER done with my own children (for example, hold him while he sleeps). I never rocked my children to sleep. I just didn't want to set any "bad habits". Another thing I do that I never did with my children was watch them sleep. I actually stay in his little nursery while he sleeps and I watch him...stare at him, while he sleeps. Yes, I read. But then I watch him sleep. Breathe. Coo. It's precious.

With my children, when they fell asleep I felt pressured to house clean or sleep myself. But I am not tired. Nor do I have to house clean. 

Daniel said "wow, Mom, you've got it made here."

Tonight, I thought about where I was in March and how much money I was making. Then in April, I took a pay-cut to watch children in my home. Currently I am making twice as less. And that's not a complaint. That's just a statement. It's a realization that money can't buy happiness nor can it buy peace. Two things that I now have that were missing at my day care position.

They were there at one time. But God has allowed changes to occur in order for me to re-align my heart with His. I am experiencing God in an entirely different light. 

And freedom. I think it comes when you realize how to be content with what you have been given. How do you do that, you may ask? Obedience. If you love God, then you will want to obey Him. 

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, 
and all these things will be given to you as well.
Matthew 6:33

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